Let go, Let God

by - 10:41 pm

Have you ever had days when you wake up and worry about tomorrow? I was just wondering, why. It is strange because I did not voluntarily want to worry and think about tomorrow - especially not the first thing when I wake up.

Most of the time when the people around me worry, at home or at work, they always ask me "Vic, why do you always seem so calm all the time?" My only reply is: I don't know. Because I don't know why I should worry about something that hasn't happen or something which is out of my control. I don't see why I want to be stressed about something non-existence in my life.

It is funny how humans love to be in control over everything and anything. I wished people realise that we don't have to be in control over everything and life isn't that bad. Yes, bills... health... money... we worry of not having enough.

But will there ever be enough?

No. Really. There will never be enough.

I am not calm and bob marley all the time. I do have my anxiety attacks and it usually happens at the 11am when I am getting ready to go out - usually happen when I am choosing my clothes to change into - funny right? Haha. And it will just feel like the whole world is zooming past me really quickly, heart rate shoots up and vision isn't clear but frantic and panicky. Not sure why it happens, I just have to lie down and close my eyes. But those are my usual random short moments of anxiety attacks. I don't get anxiety attacks thinking about tomorrow or next year.

Image result

Whenever my soul is weak, that's when I lose my good vibes. I highly believe in energy and vibes from our human spirit. No, I am not into any extreme soul-searching kinda thing but I guess this is something personal. I always tell people around me that if you manifest that energy, it is what it will be. If you say and feel that it is going to be a bad day, it will be.

I like to practice good vibes all the time - reminding myself of the goodness of life and looking at everything with a positive perspective. Of course, not to the point of living in fake reality. Whenever I am weak and feeling down, I turn to my bible verses to remind myself where I stand and not lose it. God's promises in the bible is something I held close to my heart since I was young. Brought up in a Christian family, it was only 14 when I made a decision myself to join a church and get baptised. My parents did not force me into it but I was faithfully attending bible studies, cell groups and services. I love my Saturdays and Fridays. I remember taking part in bible verses challenge - and I never memorised anything so faithfully at school before but I was acing my bible verses.

It helped me grow and 12 years later, it stays strong and rooted in my soul. I admit, with my job now and since touch rugby took up my Saturdays since i was 18, I swayed away from church and I wished I had time to go to church now. It is a me-moment that nobody could ever give me but God.

Image result

I don't think I say it enough but God works beautifully and so magically. The impossible can be done, and you just need faith. Faith, to me, is not worrying about tomorrow but knowing who holds your tomorrow and future.

I have tons on my mind right now, a million to worry about the future and so many unknown that is coming up but you know what? I let them go, and let God.

If I cannot see the future, I don't pretend to see it. God knows everything.
If it is meant to be, it will be. 

Life being unpredictable, may not be that bad after all :)

Just sharing a little of my thoughts as I sit on the bed, thinking about what I should have for dinner. And of course, such decisions like that, God won't decide for you. Haha.

Happy Saturday vibes x

You May Also Like


Instagram ::: @thepinksoldier