Gone too soon.

by - 3:39 am

2014 has been a rough year. of course, it has its good days where God decided to drop some angels in my life and taught me many life lessons and pick-me-ups to sail through life a lot easier. but on the sadder days, He decided it is time to take his angels back. 

the tougher part in life is to lose people that you love.
 that sums my 2014. 

we attached ourselves so strongly that when they are gone, a part of us is gone too. you don't know where to start living again and continue where you are. the biggest fear in my life (besides the physical ones like cockroaches), is to lose people I hold close to in my life. i've always been afraid of losing people i love. sometimes, it makes me wonder if there is anyone out there who is afraid of losing me?

thantophobia; that's what they call someone who has the phobia of losing their loved ones.

2014 is the weakest i've ever seen myself... and also, the strongest i can ever be.

i guess the biggest gift you can give yourself after all of these is to bounce back stronger, better and tougher. i can't find a reason to crumble and stay down on the floor. sadness stays on the ground but don't live long when you hold your head high and reposition your focus. we are all human after all.

if you're sad, let it out. i love to cry my head out until i get so tired and fall asleep. when i wake up, i start all over again but this time, stronger and much more determined to achieve better. do that! you notice how much further you climb on the ladder.

but for today, i'm gonna take a break.
i cannot deny i'm sad. and very very sad.

 i'm only human.

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